I remember an experience where one of my teachers always ignored my questions. He almost never allowed me to ask questions. He would either tell me to put my hand down or ignore me entirely. Ever been asked to keep quiet when trying to make a point? Well, that is the silent battle an African child goes through daily. We are either ignored or blatantly told to shut up.
In the life of an African child, there is always one phrase–shut up–that is constantly being hammered into our ears. Our parents, teachers, peers, and even strangers ask us to shut up. We hear this phrase in multiply languages; for a Ga child it is ‘Feemɔ diŋŋ’, for an Igbo child it is ‘Kpuchie ọnụ’, for a Zulu child it is ‘Thula’ and for an Egyptian child it is أخرس–akhras.
Why are we asked to shut up? Most adults fear that we would question their authority so they tell us to shut up. Some also believe that we are too young to make meaningful contributions in conversations because of their stereotypical beliefs that children are not wise. Yes, an adult may have experience that a child does not have but the child is more in touch with technological advancements.
Does this affect us? Yes, it does. We grow up thinking being asked to shut up is normal. This would cause us to do the same to our offspring and younger peers, making this cyclical. Also, we would grow up expecting to be asked to shut up whenever we speak up. In class, we do not ask questions because we fear our teacher and classmates may shut us down. When we grow to become adults, during social gatherings like business meetings, we would just sit and observe without making contributions to the conversations going on. We would not voice our emotions and troubles to our parents. We would prefer to talk to peers who may not always give the best advice, leading us wayward. Some children cannot even differentiate between bad from good so they end up choosing the wrong paths which may lead to a criminal life.
Parents, encourage your wards to voice out their feelings in a polite manner using words like “Please,” “Thank you” and “Excuse me”. Listen when your wards try to talk to you. Do not just nod when they talk. Ask them how, why, and what. Children, use polite words when talking to adults and peers. Teachers, assign time in your lessons for students to ask questions. To the community, do not allow stereotypical beliefs control your understanding of children speaking up. Remember your voice is your power. Never let anyone take that from you. Keep voicing out your ideas always.